If your relationship recently came to an unfortunate end, you're in the midst of a horde of horrible feelings that seem heavy and overwhelming. It's a reality that is all-too common. It isn't one that cannot be overcome. There is a lot of advice out there to get an ex back, but it's not all going to work out. In order to successfully regain your relationship, you need to exert extreme amounts of patience and self-control. By staying one step ahead of the curve, you're putting yourself in the best possible position to achieve your goal, and you won't be caught unaware again.
1st Part is to Move Away from the Denial:
Denial is a common defense mechanism to keep people from pain. It's one of the first walls that go up in defense to a potential hurtful scenario, and it's a difficult wall to overcome. It is a wall that you will have to move past in order to have any chance of rekindling your romance. Denial is going to do nothing to further your cause - in fact, it could damage it irrevocably. Refusing to accept a breakup is one of the worst things you could do if you want to get your relationship back. It only makes you seem needy or desperate - and neither of those qualities are going to make you any more appealing to your ex.
If you want one moment that will make the road ahead even a slight bit easier, the moment where you accept your breakup is the one that can make the difference. It's a crucial tool towards your ultimate goal, and it's good for your overall well-being.
2nd Part is to Simply Step Away:
After a breakup, the desire to contact your ex in an effort to continue the comfort of having them as a part of your life is often overwhelming. Walking away goes against everything you're thinking, and it seems like it would only make the breakup process easier for them - and harder for you. You want to do whatever possible to keep them from forgetting about you, and you want to remind them that you're still there, and that you still love them.
The truth is that you don't need to jump up and down and do cartwheels to get their attention. Your ex has probably been keeping track of you - at least on the sly. They want to know how you're handling the breakup, and they want to be the first person to know if you start moving on without them. They probably left a few dangling conversations hanging, just to keep you around. By refusing to participate in their plan, you're going to make them take action to a new level. That means reestablishing contact, reaching out and putting subtlety on the back burner. This can lead to a new level of communication and increase your overall desirability in their minds. Ultimately that's going to be a big part of your goal - and while it may not be easy to keep your distance, it doesn't require any drastic moves on your part that could backfire unintentionally.
3rd Part is to Rediscover and Revamp Your Image:
History has a way of making you remember things differently - especially romantic history. Sometimes the key to getting your ex's attention back is to do something inherently positive - not by being dramatic or causing a scene. Focus on things that originally caught your ex's attention when you first met or first began a romantic interest. Compare the person you were then to the person that you are now. What changes were beneficial? Which ones were not as positive? The second set of changes is the one that you need to focus on now, and that's what you ultimately have to work on in order to encourage positive growth.
If you can remind your ex of the person that you were when you first started dating, they will unconsciously associate the positive emotions of when you first met with the person that you're now becoming. This association will be purely an act of their subconscious mind, but it will be entirely in your favor. Bringing these feelings back to the surface can be a key aspect to winning back their affections and getting them interested in a romantic relationship with you all over again.
4th Part is to Figure Out Ways to Get Your Ex to Pursue You:
Getting your ex to chase after you like they did initially isn't as hard as it initially seems. In fact, you're already well on your way without even realizing it. By keeping your distance you've already created a void in your ex's life - one that they never expected that they'd have to face. That key factor is going to be the tipping point to balance the scales, if not tip them completely in your direction.
When your ex starts to reach out, don't cave right off the bat. You want to play hard to get - at least a little bit. That will make the need even more pronounced which means that they'll have to resort to more drastic measures - the very thing you were trying to avoid throughout this whole process. Since it will be on their end rather than yours, it will portray you incredibly positively - and that will make you even more desirable when they finally do reconnect.
If you've been watching every step you take to avoid potentially stepping on a land mine, you've done a good job. It would be a shame to blow all of your hard work now by making a mistake. Since one wrong move can cost you everything, come up with a plan - and stick to it. That will increase your chances overall and make your ex see you even more positively.
What To Do Next
Being dumped is not an easy thing to bare. You can win back your ex with a little know how and learning to see things from your ex's perspective. There are so many more techniques and psychological principals that you need to use now to make this happen. One such way is to avoid these break up mistakes, they will force you to take an honest look at your behaviour and how it could be preventing you from getting back together with your ex.
Source: http://www.streetarticles.com/reconnecting/how-win-back-your-ex-study-these-techniques
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